Grumpy Gamer

Damn It Robin!

Sun, 07 Feb 2010 09:40:49 -0800

DeathSpank Named Game of the Century

Sat, 19 Dec 2009 07:35:37 -0800

People often stop me on the street and say "Hey Ron!" and I say "I don't have any change...get job!" and then they say "We're not beggars, we just want to know why you're working so hard on DeathSpank?" and I say "We do it for you so you can play the best damn game ever!" and then I give them some pocket change so they can buy booze.

One of the things we've been working so hard on the last 2 months is dialog. Over 6000 lines of the funniest crap you'll ever hear. How do I know it's funny? Because actors never study their lines. They just come in to the studio and begin recording and quite often they will start laughing and we'll have to stop recording because it's the first time they've read it and it's funny.

I wanted to introduce you to a couple of the actors in DeathSpank and who better to start with than Michael Dobson who plays DeathSpank. When we did auditions back in March I had no real idea what DeathSpank should sound like. Michael was the first person to read for the part and he nailed it so perfectly that we just stopped looking. He's top notch and when he's in the recording studio he becomes DeathSpank. I can't imagine the game without him.

Second on the list is Brian Dobson (no relation to Michael Dobson...oh wait...my mistake, they're brothers). Brian plays Eubrick the Retired with perfection (not to mention several other roles). For those of you that saw the demos at PAX, we were showing one of the dialogs between DeathSpank and Eubrick.

Next up on the star studded list is Orange Couch. Not sure how we would have made it without Orange Couch. This is where I'd sit and pour over scripts and do last minute rewrites if things weren't working out or as funny as they could be.

And last is Hothead's "Sound Guy" Adam. Don't let the unassuming name of "Sound Guy" fool you, despite having his fingers on all the wrong buttons in the this picture, he knows what he's doing right up there with the best I've ever worked with and the sound design in DeathSpank is excellent.

Well, that's it for this episode of "Why the Hell Doesn't Ron Post More on His Blog!".

PAXERY

Wed, 09 Sep 2009 09:25:53 -0700

The PAXORIFFIC game show called PAX is finally over and it was PAXTASTIC, so let's go over all the PAXERY!

Now, if I was smarter, I'd divide this up into several posts to fool you into thinking I post a lot, but I'm not going to do that. You're too smart for that and I respect that smartness. Instead, I'll just break it up in to the different subjects, or "sections" as they are called in some countries.

First off...

The Keynote

I don't even know where to begin. When they asked me to do the keynote, it took three days for me to make up my mind. I've never spoken to a group of people larger than about 100 and giving the keynote at PAX was a terrifying thought of the most terrifying terrifyingness. I don't do a lot of public speaking. It terrifies me. Maybe you've heard.

I finally said yes because this was something I knew I needed to do. If I said no, I'd regret it for the rest of my life. It was a chicken I needed to slay or I was going to die trying.

I asked how many people would be coming to the keynote and they said around 2000. Big number, but I thought I could handle that. I started working on the speech immediately and spent the next two months writing and practicing and swearing off WoW for the duration. If I was going to screw this up, I was going to be damn prepared.

Day of the keynote, I arrived at the Main Hall a few hours early to get set up and check out the stage. When I walked through the door and saw the sea of chairs the calmness I had worked so hard for over the last two months vanished. "How many chairs did they set up?" I asked. "6000" was the reply. 6000! wtf! I didn't agree to this! My fear endlessly bounced between "what if only 100 people come" and "what if all 6000 people come".

There was a funny incident at the U.S. border on the way down involving PAX that I wanted to tell as an opening joke. I refused to write it down so it wouldn't seem rehearsed and ran that though in my head as I waited for the hour of reckoning.

The lights finally dimmed and they told me they were ready and I was escorted to the stage entrance as someone in my head kept calling out "deadman walking". I stood behind the curtain, took a deep breath and said "I'm ready". The curtain was pulled aside and I walked on stage.

I can't even describe what it's like to look out over 6000 people who are all looking back expecting you to do something. I wish I'd taken a picture. Seriously. I wish I'd taken a picture, that would have been really funny and I thought of it an hour after the keynote ended.

My number one goal was to get everyone to laugh in the first 15 minutes and I think I did that. I don't remember the rest of the talk. That's the honest truth. I remember the first 15 minutes and the last 5, but the rest is a odd blur.

A lot of people told me that they loved the keynote, even Wil Wheaton, so I guess I didn't dance around the stage half naked doing pirate impressions. Or maybe that's why they liked it.

Also, a huge thanks to Clayton Kauzlaric for helping me photoshop a couple of my images, most notably this one, which got a huge laugh. Also, to Deirdra Kiai for masterfully running the image-show back stage, and to Darren Evenson, Chris Mitchell and Dave Grossman for reading over my speech and telling me I can't say things like "You're all wasting your lives playing video games!" at PAX.

Wil Wheaton

Wil Wheaton has been one of my heroes for a long time. I like to think that I liked Wil before it was cool to like Wil. I was one of the few people that really liked Wesley Crusher on Next Gen and I was thrilled to find out that he was at my keynote and twittered this:

"That was the most inspiring keynote I've ever heard. So awesome. Thank you, Ron Gilbert!".

Now, why he was twittering during my keynote and not paying attention is another matter, but I'll deal with that later.

I also got a chance to meet Wil for the first time at PAX and he is truly one of the nicest guys I've ever meet and he can totally house sit for me anytime I need to be out of town.

Monkey Island Fans

Many thanks to the hundreds of fans that came up to me during the show and said thank you for Monkey Island and how they're looking forward to DeathSpank. You are truly the most awesome group of people I've ever known and I love each and everyone one of you more than the others.

I only had to sign one body part at the show, so I consider that a big win!

Dominic Armato

Despite being the voice of my creation Guybrush Threepwood, I had never met Dominic before. Back when we were doing Monkey 1 and 2, the thought of voice was crazy talk. "Computers will never be able to do that!" I'd scream, then follow up with "You can't connect more than two computer together at the same time!" and other insane rantings that all turned out to be completely wrong.

But I digress.

If PAX wasn't thrill packed enough for me, I got to hang out with Dominic Armato and maybe PAX is just filled with nothing but cool people, but damn is Dominic one cool guy. I never had a voice in mind for Guybrush (voice acting being crazy talk and all), but I always thought Dom (I can call him that now that we're BFFs) nailed it and it's double cool that he's such a nice guy. And Dominic, if you're reading this, good call on ordering the pizza.

DeathSpank

Holy crap! DeathSpank pwned PAX. Am I using the word pwned right? I think it means "any small, ornamental mat, as of embroidery or lace used to decorate".

We gave hourly live demos on the show floor and the DeathSpank booth was packed for every demo. We ran though one of the Monkey Island style dialogs with Eubrick the Retired and then went around killing stuff.

We had this and another 14 inch tall DeathSpank statue on display for people to touch and break small parts off of. We also made four smaller ones that we gave away to five lucky people. Yes. I know. Four statues and five people. It's how we entertain ourselves.

This is where I spent most of PAX. Locked in a small room in the back of the show demoing DeathSpank to an endless stream of press and people looking for the bathroom. Harmonix had their Beatles Rock Band stage right outside our meeting room. I now hate the Beatles.

But enough about DeathSpank, let's talk about DeathSpank!

But first watch this...

...then...

READ
THIS
AND
THIS
AND
THIS
AND LISTEN TO THIS
THEN READ THIS!

DeathSpank OMFG!!!1111!!11!11

Mon, 31 Aug 2009 15:33:37 -0700

I don't know why I used exclamation points and the number one in that title. It seemed like something all the cool kids on the internet are doing, so I guess I was just trying to be cool. But I'll tell you something teh cool kids on the internet can't do, and that's make DeathSpank.

1up is starting a week of in-depth behind the scenes DeathSpank coverage. It's rumored that Republicans and Democrats alike are putting their differences aside in the contentious health care debate and joining with president Obama in a week of unity and reading about DeathSpank.

1up will have a plethora of screen shots to show, but I've picked one of my favorites to post here, just for the premium subscribers to Grumpy Gamer.

This is a shot of DeathSpank making his way up these really high mountains with snow on the peaks called The Really High Mountains with Snow on the Peaks.

More to come at PAX.

P.S.

Anyone have any ideas for what I should talk about in the PAX Keynote on friday? I should probably start writing that.

Grog XD

Sun, 30 Aug 2009 20:11:10 -0700

Nothing I could write will be funnier than this video:

Awesome Awesome Monday

Fri, 28 Aug 2009 09:35:00 -0700

Monday's going to be a pretty awesome day on the internet thingy. You know it's going to be awesome because I don't use the word awesome very awesome! I mean often! Often. Often. Often.

PAXish

Sat, 08 Aug 2009 09:32:28 -0700

Philosophers around the world pretty much agree that PAX is about the most damn exciting show there is. Much of the debate currently going on in the marbled halls and ivory towers of the intellectual elite is if me giving this years PAX keynote makes it more exciting or if I'll get up on stage and freeze from stage fright and you'll all stare at me for 45 minutes wondering if this is some some avant-garde performance piece.

Of course, confusing the toga wearing philosophers even more is that Hothead will be showing DeathSpank at PAX. And when I say "showing", I really mean "showing", like in "actual" "game play".

To truly understand how all this effects PAX, I decided to enlist the help of the world's "top" "mathematicians". I gave them all the universal constants and variables and they came up with this:

Think on that Philosphers. Much like on the grade school playground, math wins again.

The Tale of the Scurvy Raider

Wed, 05 Aug 2009 18:23:12 -0700

Aye, arg, gar! Pull up a peg leg and have a seat, for me be tell'n the tale o' the Scurvy Raider, the finest pirate ship t' sail the sea. Lost one dark and stormy eve, near eighteen years ago, all her crew feared dead or worse. Arrr, but this tale be not ha'in' a sad endin', for the Scurvy Raider has returned t' port with a mighty tale t' tell. The tale o' a dark and stormy eve near eighteen years ago.

OK, you know what? Typing Pirate is hard.

Back when I was working at Lucasfilm, I used to have a giant Lego pirate ship. It sat across from my desk on this low end table and when the nights would grow long and the work day became tiring I would look over at the Scruvy Raider and it would remind me of what we were building; it would remind me of the soul of this game called Monkey Island.

When I left Lucasfilm the Lego pirate ship mysteriously disappeared. I remember cleaning out my office and saying my goodbyes then noticing the Lego pirate ship was gone. I asked around but no one knew what happened to it. It was simply gone, lost at sea, never to be seen again...

...until...

A few days ago when a giant package arrive at my door step. I carefully opened it to find this inside:

Attached to it was a note scribbled on LucasArts stationary that simply said "We found your pirate ship".

Thanks Guys!!!

The Scurvy Raider II has come home, sailing into port for a reunion that onlookers called teary-eyed and joyful. It will once again become a beacon of light into the soul of what we are making.

Party like it's 1989

Thu, 09 Jul 2009 11:05:06 -0700

Hold on there, someone check a calendar and see if it's 1989?

In addition to Monkey Island, several of LucasArts (it was called Lucasfilm Games when I was there) classic adventure games are now on Steam, some of which I had the great pleasure of working on. I can't tell everyone how much it warms my cold grumpy heart to see these games re-released, and even more exciting to me is how LucasArts has embraced this wonderful period of their history.

It's hard for me not to think of LucasArts much as someone does their University Alma Mater. I don't work there anymore, put I still take great pride in the things they do and even though there are probably 3 people left that worked there when I did, I feel like they are my family.

When I started at Lucasfilm there were nine people in the entire Game's Group, nine of the smartest people I had ever met. The time I spent working at Lucasfilm were most influential years of my life. They informed much of who I am as a game designer, a programmer and as a person.

I just want to publicly thank everyone at LucasArts for the work they have done on these games and the care they have shown for them.

PAX 2009 Keynote

Sat, 04 Jul 2009 11:39:59 -0700

Yes, the vicious rumors are true (if an official press release can be considered a rumor), I will be keynoting this year's PAX, quite possible the most excellent gaming convention to ever exist. To be honest, I have no idea what a keynote is. I assume it means I have to go around the show and take notes. Doesn't sound too hard. I just hope they can read my handwriting.